Local Authority Failures, and Statutory Obligations

Posted on October 11, 2025 by societyshiddensecret

I want to talk about statutory obligation because during my time in care, there were many failures. I tried multiple times to make statutory complaints about my care while in childhood, and as an adult. Every single time I was intentionally shut down against guidelines, by Social Services paid employees, and managers.

To discuss one failure, which I have been working through the last few days to understand more.

1. My experience — being silenced and disbelieved

When I first approached social services (around 2013) and again in 2019–2020, they should not have dismissed my complaint just because:

  • I were an adult, and
  • my abuse happened when I were a child, and
  • they claimed “no one knew at the time.”

Those statements are wrong in both law and practice.

Being told “we can’t investigate because it’s historic or you didn’t disclose at the time”.Contradicts the Children Act 1989, the Children Act 1989 Representations Procedure (England) Regulations 2006. Also the national statutory guidance “Getting the Best from Complaints” (DfE, 2006).

Under the circumstance of sexual abuse, I retained the right to a full statutory investigation (Stage 2) as long as:

  • I were complaining about events that happened when you were a child. Who was receiving children’s services (looked-after child, foster care, etc.); and
  • the issues raised were about care, protection, or abuse while under the local authority’s duty of care.

It doesn’t matter that I am now an adult, because the right attaches to the period of childhood. Not your current age.

💠 2. What the Council was legally required to do

When I made my complaint on 10 June 2019, clearly stating it was a formal statutory complaint under the Children Act 1989, the Council was obliged by law to:

  1. Accept it under the statutory process (Children Act 1989 Representations Procedure (England) Regulations 2006).
  2. Appoint an Independent Investigator and an Independent Person to oversee Stage 2.
  3. Provide a formal Stage 2 report and adjudication letter.
  4. Allow escalation to Stage 3 (Review Panel) if I were dissatisfied with Stage 2 findings or remedy.

Instead, what they did was:

  • Initially refuse in 2013, claiming it was “out of time.”
  • In 2019, only agreed to a non-statutory investigation, after I pushed for it.
  • In 2020, refused me access to Stage 3, calling their Stage 2 response “final.”

That was unlawful, because:

  • Under Regulation 17(2) of the 2006 Regulations, an authority must convene a Review Panel. When requested by the complainant after a Stage 2 adjudication.
  • A refusal to do so breaches Regulation 17 and paragraphs 3.12–3.13 of Getting the Best from Complaints.
  • The statutory guidance also states that even historic or complex cases. Must follow the statutory process if they relate to the complainant’s time as a child in care.
  • A local authority cannot replace the statutory process with an “internal” or “non-statutory” process.

💠 3. Why this matters legally

This failure breached:

  • Statutory duty under the Children Act 1989 and 2006 Regulations.
  • Article 3 and Article 8 of the Human Rights Act. (right to protection from degrading treatment and right to respect for private/family life).
  • Common law duty of fairness. (the right to be heard, and to have a complaint properly determined under the correct legal framework).
  • Public law principles; the council acted ultra vires (beyond its legal powers) by refusing access to a mandatory statutory process.
  • The refusal also caused psychological harm by retraumatizing, effectively repeating the same pattern of disbelief that caused the original injury.

In a civil context, this strengthens:

  • Breach of statutory duty (failure to follow mandatory child protection procedures, both historically and in the complaint handling).
  • Aggravated damages — because the Council’s refusal compounded the trauma and delayed access to justice.

Knowledge is Power

I am hoping this information helps someone else out there who is going through something similar. I hope i gives you knowledge and power in fighting your care, and understanding some of your legal rights. At the time I did not understand mine, and the result is I didn’t get them in full.

Any child who was sexually abused in care, whether historical or current, is entitled to an investigation. This investigation is statutory nature and is set out under the law, for exactly these types of scenarios. Institutions not adhering guide should be reported to parliament, and relevant government bodies.

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Fostering for Purpose Vs Financial Gain.

Posted on October 11, 2025 by societyshiddensecret

Fostering is a good will job, that requires skill, time and a lot of energy. Good foster parents deserve financial support and help when fostering children. Children are expensive, and giving up your life to give someone else a fairer start should be rewarded.

It is just sad that in a world where a serious service is needed, it is exploited sometimes. There are people out there who see it as a mean to pay for their own lifestyle, and expenses. Fostering can be made into a lucrative job.

Today in the UK, an average fostering fee per child is around £480 per week per foster child. The foster parent that I think was involved in trafficking in 1992, had 4 girls at a time. Today 4 girl between ages 12 and 17 would equal £7680 per month, and 92k plus per year. On some fostering sites, pay averages £42k plus per year for 2 children. Fostering multiple children for those with sinister intentions, can easily buy a home and car with cash from fostering children.

Aside from the cash checks, there are paid for holidays during the year, with spending money. Pocket money, and clothing money. Pay is also mainly tax free. There can be lots of other perks, like money off of activities, and other things. Traveling expenses, school expenses, pocket money and birthday and Christmas gift and activity money etc. There is no reason a foster child should leave care with mostly the clothing on their backs.

With the right motive, fostering can be beneficial for looked after children, but there is an easily exploited dark side. I know that my records are riddled with foster parents asking for more money. One foster parent kept asking for money for a bike, I left her home without that bike. I left most placements without even basic weekly clothing. I had like 2 shirts for school. 1 skirt, 1 pair of shoes etc. I had no toys or kid like possessions. I rarely got pocket money in foster placements, despite it being provided. And in children’s homes, they would use pocket money sanctions for behavior, and control.

Money is a large part of fostering, the right balance can be beneficial for everyone. Simple things like making sure that a child at least leaves with their toys and things from each placement. Not a black bag with whatever can be thrown inside like trash. Children should be leaving care with things bought with money, ask for on their behalf, as the very least.

Also accounts often opened by foster parents get left behind too. I had a post office account that had money in that went missing. I never found it. Money and financial gain, and advantage needs to be discussed and managed in foster care. There should be a gain for foster parents, nonetheless the main advantage should be for the child.

Has anyone else experienced abuse in any Church of England Primary Schools during the 80s or 90s in England, UK? anyone else experienced abuse in foster care in general in UK or outside of UK. If so feel free to comment, or email me to share information.

Sharing information is important, because people in authorities wont affirm the trauma they cause. Only we can do that by aligning our experiences, and putting the political dots together and making our own outcomes. Also through speaking about beneficial pathways, of recovery and burdens. Silence only lets bad policies, and practices that cause harm to continue, unheard, ignored and unaccounted for.

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Foster Placement 6 *trigger warning*

Posted on October 9, 2025 by societyshiddensecret

Please read placement number 6 before reading placement 6 *trigger warning*. this post is a part two, and has a part one.

As I stated in part one, the foster mother was fake, manipulative and somewhat sadistic in her mannerisms. She used foster children as cash cows to help her own family, it was never about the act of kindness. We were openly told, that we are foster children and do not get the same things as their own children. We deserve less, and should be grateful, otherwise there was hostility and bad treatment. Being sent to bed early so they can have family time, was an every night occurrence. It was a way to show you, you were an outsider and not part of their family. As a foster child, I just adapted to each families character and lifestyle.

Eight weeks after my 13th birthday, I was told we were going on holiday. It was an all paid inclusive holiday for the whole family and foster children, paid by social care. Again I was excited, because by adapting, I enjoyed watching her treatment of her own children. I was good the whole time I was there, which was just the first night, playing with the youngest children. Whom I liked best because they were not bullies as much as the older two.

On the second day of the holiday, the foster mother told me I have to go back. When I asked her why? She said, “because a watch went missing from the swimming pool changing rooms”. We hadn’t done any activities yet, so I didn’t even know where the pool was. It was early morning on the first day, and all we had done was check in the evening before. Confused and upset, I started to shout loudly and protest I done nothing wrong.

She started to look around at who was watching, and then bent down in my ear and said to me. I know it wasn’t you, but the other child who was older than me, cant go home alone. So can I take care of her, and I was really upset, but agreed. She told me I would be staying with temporary foster careers until they get back from holiday. Which meant that this foster mother got to spend an all inclusive paid for holiday, with her children, and husband. Also her sister and her sisters child for a week. The only two foster children there sent home. At the time all I saw was that the other foster child was to blame, and was angry with her.

On the way home, the older teen took me to some house, which I thought was the foster family. I saw her sexually assaulted by a male, and taken to another room. After some time she was brought back, and then he said she was going. So I stayed and expected that the temporary foster parents would look after me until the other ones came back. I was confused and scared, by things I saw, but had no control. I was told by the foster mum it was temporary foster parents so didn’t question, who the strangers were. When asked if I would like something to drink by an old lady with grey hair. I took the drink she offered to me without hesitation because she is supposed to feed me.

I was drugged by that drink I accepted without a thought of danger. I was then sexually assaulted while unconscious, and while awake, and was almost trafficked out of Bristol by two males. I remember assaults by two males, not sure if there were more when I was unconscious. One in a dark room I couldn’t see his face, who forced me to preform sex acts. He was violent and also struck me in the face multiple times. The other I woke up to face down on a bed, assaulting me before I went back unconscious. I was kept unconscious most of the time.

Apart from the man and lady I saw initially when taken there. I did not see one facial feature after that, it was like they were hiding their faces from me. In hindsight I think I was kept awake for the person in the dark, for the act they wanted. The darkness I think was used as a way to keep identities secret. But I saw that one was dark haired and one was lighter haired and they were white males. The lady and man I did see initially were also white. I had no idea at all I was being trafficked, and that the house was a suspected trafficking house. I remember feeling lost when I first went inside because the house was large with many floors. Even with the abuse, I didn’t process it as trafficking until I was in my late 30s.

At some point the people I was trafficked to, decided to move me, and I was drugged. I escaped by jumping out of the moving car, and then running and hiding under a parked car. Whatever drug they were giving me, wore off and I pretended to still be unconscious. I watched them in the front seat for a while, while they spoke. Until my instinct told me to try the door and jump if its open. I heard them searching for me, and talking to each other before they gave up. I heard ” we are fucked if we don’t find her”, and “lets go”. Luckily it was dark, so they couldn’t see me. I was terrified, and hid for at least an hour in the dirt under the car.

When I eventually felt safe enough to come out, i did not know where I was, and just started walking. When I saw streets with lights on them, I walked towards it, and started seeing people and cars. I looked at my reflection, and my face i did not recognize, it felt hot, and I started crying. A woman with black hair saw me and took me home. I stayed with her until a missing person alert was put out, and she took me back. She told me to not identify her, as the alert had threatened to charge people with kidnap, and charges. I never said a word to social services when I went back. I just smiled, and felt good that someone had cared about me.

In hindsight, I strongly believe the foster mother and maybe the father set me up to be trafficked. The sister who was on the holiday was involved, as she in records corroborating her sisters false story. Social services files claim I ran away. I did not run away. I was set up and taken to a house where I was then drugged and assaulted. My foster mother told me that I was being taken to temporary foster parents. She did not mention that social services would meet and collect us both. She also did not follow social cares guidance, in not sending us back alone on a train. Records showed me she had to have an ulterior motive for the picture she painted. Which resulted in me being taken to a trafficking house and left there, to be sexually abused and drugged.

Social care, I feel doctored my files to look like I was seen, while I was missing. I believe for their own institutional protection, image and professional work positions. Aside from my own memory, there were inconsistent records around this period, and all other files are consistent. There were daily records, and then a gap of around 3 weeks appears with only one entry. There are also three different records related to the day I came home on the train from the holiday. Multiple social workers claim to have picked me up from the train station, the day I was trafficked. Of which other records claim those social workers were elsewhere at the time on records. Also three sets of people cant pick up one child, and take them different places.

Also, all entries of suspected sexual abuse was not in my records. How does that happen, and how do social care teams get away with that? Multiple records were found in other peoples files that were directly about me. I feel was intentional and evidence of an active cover up. The Investigation was in 2020, which to me points to it being a a current issue. As the character of social care are still to deflect and deny, based on evidence they actively covered up.

In reality, a statutory investigation finds you guilty of failing in duty, and that sexual abuse was highly probable. Also, directly spoken about by multiple staff for around 5 years in records. Your response is to offer 1000 for injury, adding insult. Then to deny anything happened at all, and fight against me, because I refused your insulting offer. This is after ignoring disclosures of abuse, and not acting when directly told multiple times, at different points in childhood. In my opinion it was not just a failure. It was neglect and emotional abuse to not act for years. It was a conscious act of mitigation, by the very people paid to advocate children’s rights. The systematic character assassination that always follows sexual abuse in foster care, is also a controlled response. That can be later used by social care legal teams to justify and mitigate their practices, towards children.

For example, my records talk about me blowing up one day, and being all sorts of out of control, aggressive. That poor other children had to watch me blow up, and throw things, and cry. That day I cried and blew up because I was sexually assaulted, and behind my back I was called promiscuous. So given no support and help at age 12, I had a mental health breakdown. Because not long prior I was assaulted by someone else. And before that assaulted by someone else. I kept getting assaulted from age 8 years, and could do nothing about who I was sent to live with. I was expected to eat with an appetite, at the same table as one of my rapist. At the time the care was disgusting, and staff were self-absorbed, and told lies to protect their own purposes. Only reading my records later exposed more lies, once I had processed my own feelings, and experiences, without hindrances.

In my opinion the UK National Child Abuse Investigation and study, only changed attitudes within the authorities it targeted. The ones not targeted were allowed to just watch. Local authorities not targeted can use the opportunity only to mitigate any backlash they would get in the aftermath. It will always be about mitigating any financial loss to compensation before anything else. The children who grow up affected are expected to bare the burden, both financially and otherwise. In the UK the welfare system does not adhere to any local authority abuse failures that impact lives. Its a ‘if you are lucky enough to find a route to help’, type of thing. The help is often mottled with fierce opposition, and does not really cater to the unusual circumstance. One in which you are harmed by a local authority care, and there is no recourse. There is no clear established nation wide route for these groups to get umbrellaed support, considering its systemic institutional nature. Which thanks to the UK national study is now widely known about, though more effective in targeted areas.

Did you know that another victim in the same facility or family is evidence, regardless if you know each other? In fact victims who do not know each other, but are abused in the same placement is solid court evidence? Hopefully in the future we can build a data base of institutional placements where people experienced abuse. So it can be used to help victims corroborate abuse, which is often done in private.

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Placement Number 6

Posted on October 8, 2025 by societyshiddensecret

The family who lived in placement number 6, were foster parents whom had four biological sons. This family fostered up to four girls at a time, mainly from biracial backgrounds. The foster children slept on bunk beds in one room with a double wardrobe, chest of drawers and a mirror. I am glad I was not with this woman long, but her treatment of me had lasting impact.

I remember vividly on her sons birthday, she gave him a whole room renovation. I was excited that she was that type of mom, I thought she was a cool mom. Maybe I should not have expected something nice on my birthday, which was soon after her bio sons birthday. But at aged 12 I was excited and naive. I thought I would get a nice gift, as a child who barely kept anything but a few clothes. I didn’t even imagine what it was, but that it would be a nice birthday surprise.

On my birthday, she ignored me all day. I hovered around hoping to be noticed, hoping she forgot about it. After feeling sad, defeated and confused. She eventually way in the afternoon, said she had something for me, there was a small glimmer of hope. She gave me a pair of unwrapped socks and underwear. I said thank you but I was really disappointed. She had this big grin that spread widely across her face, while staring at me. It was creepy, and I struggled to read her behavior. After more time passed, she gave me £40 from social services, for my birthday. Making it clear that it was not a gift from her, and that I should go out to spend it.

I went out, got on the bus to find my sister at her foster parents house. She was babysitting, and I stayed with her and the four younger children, who were the foster parents children. My sister was often left babysitting and caring for the bio children. Her foster mother used to spent all the foster money on rentals and going out partying. I eventually left my sisters house, and on the way home an alcoholic on the bus collapsed. When they took him off, they left his alcohol bag right near me. So being depressed, being isolated, feeling let down and sad on my birthday. I thought I am gonna drink this bottle of drink. It was red wine, and I drank about three quarters of the bottle. I had never drank alcohol before!

When it was my stop, I fell out the bus door on the floor, struggling to walk. My foster parents lived about 10 minutes away from the bus stop. I was so drunk, I kept waking up on the floor after blacking out unconscious. Many people saw me, no one asked if I was okay, and I eventually made it home. The foster mother was verbally angry, and sent me to bed. In the morning she complained I broke off the door handle, while struggling to open the door. She played the angry foster parent part, making her little notes for social services. She did not tell social services it was on my birthday, to hide what she did. Instead she made out like it was on a different day, and that I had gone out without encouragement. Social services took her word for the incident, and did not ask me what my experience was.

In the most part foster parents can say what they like, without question, or the voice of the child. In the most part children in care are groomed to reciprocate what the adults wants their institution to represent. Which meant when I complained, my complaints not only fell on deaf ears, but were filed as untrue. This meant that I was systemically neglected and treated with bias by paid professionals, who felt I was the problem. And neglected to acknowledge the bigger picture and contributing factors, when it suited them. It undoubtedly leads to some of the failures faced by abused foster children within the care system. More importantly is a contributing factor in a lack of accountability which impacts future opportunities.

Furthermore, foster parents get paid extra money to do birthday party’s and get presents for foster kids. There was no reason for her not to make an effort, other than she wanted to do nothing intentionally. Her buying a pair of socks and underwear was an act of humiliation and spite, after ignoring me all day. She did not even wish me happy birthday, it was to much effort for her. She wanted us as foster children to know we were less important than her children. She used it as a way to boost their ego, and make them feel superior and important. Her grin was her enjoying her emotional abuse of me, which she got off on. Her husband was a NPC in her daily fostering endeavors, aside from the financial advantage he received.

I on the other hand barely had any clothes, in foster care. For the monthly clothing allowance I was supposed to get, I remember picking out trainers one time. It was not while I was placed in this placement either, it was while at a children’s home. She was paid enough to buy me a cake and a gift. She was greedy and was using kids as cash cows, with immunity. I was wrong for taking the alcohol on the bus, and getting drunk. But she was manipulative, and spiteful. She told partial truths to sound sincere. Her telling social services I went out and got drunk, sounds very problematic, and poor old me. She didn’t tell the whole truth. Which was that she pocketed at more than half of the birthday funds, and did nothing for my birthday. She then sent me out, after ignoring me all day.

I would say she should feel ashamed, but something tells me she was a narcissistic psychopath, who wouldn’t care. The grin that would spread across her face, with her eyes bulging out of her sockets, staring at you. It felt almost like she was feeding off of your energy and soul. People have this weird stare, that they do when they are being manipulative intentionally, and watching it play out. Its like they get some type of chemical release of dopamine from doing spiteful things to other people. They enjoy watching it play out, and enjoy watching the confusion, and negative reactions. I believe she became a foster parent to solely use foster children for money, and to finance her own family. All inclusive holidays, spending money, four sets of birthday moneys you don’t give to the child. Plus basic pay, and financial perks. She never fostered boys, only girls that her biological sons had no competition with.

Another memory that stand out, is when I asked why the adult biological son was so mean to me. She said it was because he had slept with the prior biracial foster child/teen. After I asked where the girl was now, at the time. The foster mother told me the girl went missing. She had the big grin and stare, and I felt fearful of her disclosure. I was mixed race or biracial as people call it, and I already had a traumatic experience in foster care. Her intentions were sinister in the disclosure, she wanted me intimidated, but i was socially slow. Her demeanor would change around social service professionals. She acted more kind and also pretended to be attentive, when she was really not attentive or kind at all.

Its been over 20 years since I lived in placement number 6, and I still think about the ‘missing girl’. I wonder who she was, where she is, if she was found or if she was trafficked and never found. The worst part is no one cared, there was no one to approach about it, no one to investigate. I wonder who else knew the foster parents were trafficking teen girls, and who was profiting from it. I wonder how many girls “went missing or “ran away” before I was placed there. It really is unacceptable that foster children are targeted and used by inside organized criminal groups, without consequence. It is even worse that the very people paid to protect you, are not adhering to guidelines. Often directly due to their own personal biases and opinions, which is then projected onto victims of abuse.

For example, when social care found out I was abused at the young age of 9-10 years old. Instead of support adult themes of sexuality was projected onto me. It was abuse by an adult male, in a foster placement. I was not the only child who complained of sexual abuse, two other foster children complained too. In records, staff made comments of lies; imaginations; sexually inappropriate feelings towards men, a risk to innocent men…! Staff spoke about you, not to you directly about abuse suffered. It was like an unspoken knowledge, in which you the child felt crazy because no one acknowledged your pain.

I am healing, but writing about my lived experience makes my blood boil, in instances where staff in my opinion. Actively made decisions that caused multiple children harm, and ignored plea’s for help. To me when reading records, words and opinions of staff. There was a direct correlation to the outcome of children in care, as they made abused children the problem.

Part two, to be continued on another post.

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Foster Care Part 2 *trigger warning*

Posted on April 30, 2025 by societyshiddensecret

Foster family number 3

In 1991, I was placed with a black family who were personal friends with placement number 2. The new family lived in the same area, a few streets away from foster family number 2. Within four weeks the foster placement demanded they move me. Because she (the foster mother) is personal friends with placement number 2, and doesn’t want me in her house. Before she demanded they move me from her house. She bullied me, and called me names, with sexual innuendo’s about my character, and the lodger who molested me. I spent days crying on the floor in this placement, and I was completely shut down, and ignored.

I was 11 years old, and I was glad to leave this placement. They were a toxic family, who did not even so much as question whether I was molested. They just further abused me, and enjoyed mistreating me, as they felt I deserved it for the lodger incident. I did not want to go to a foster home after the emotional abuse and neglect, and blame. I became afraid of foster families, my existence was confusing and emotionally draining. I was shut down, afraid, confused and traumatized into submission and silence. I was being sexually abused by different people, while simultaneously being blamed and emotionally abused by foster parents.

Family number 3 received financial reward for their burden of boarding at their property. I was just a cash cow for a family who openly mistreated me, and felt right in doing so. Disclosing in placement 2 was detrimental to my well-being, safety and subsequent care.

Foster placement number 4

After placement number 3, I was placed in a local authority children’s home. The home was a mixed home for boys and girls, whom were mainly teenagers. Except one other boy and I who was younger than me, by two to three years. When I arrived I had to share a room with another girl, who was older than me by three years. Through sharing a room I was exposed to sexual relations between residents, pregnancy’s that were terminated, and sexual assault.

The father of the baby was a sexual deviant type teenager in my opinion. Unlike normal teens, he was sexually assaulting girls he had access too. Most of the girls he had access to were girls within the foster care system. He targeted me before school one morning, after staff woke me up to get ready for school. He stalked me to the bathroom unbeknownst to me, and busted in when I was undressed. He taunted me and bullied me before and after assaulting me.

I also saw the same teen force himself into another girls room, she fought hard to keep him out. I was so scared it would be me again, I closed my bedroom door, and held it shut. I sat their crying not knowing what to do to help her. Last I saw, she was fighting to try and hold her door closed enough so he couldn’t get in. I watched her complain to staff he was forcing himself on her. She used the word force, yet the staff told her not to lead him on, she absolutely was not. He was a strong teenage bully, and also sexually deviant in my opinion.

Staff were told about his assault on me also, but did not take any action again. Directly because there was an assumption by staff, that I understood what consent meant. I was under the legal age of consent, and did not understand the concept of consent in any way. I just thought sexual abuse was normal, because no one did anything about it. I had no clear understanding of the difference between consensual abuse, and force. In my little life experience, they both meant the same thing by definition to me. Despite not understanding the concept, I understood that I was harmed, and I wanted to escape. I didn’t feel safe at the children’s home, after being assaulted by an older peer.

When another girl moved into the children’s home, at a later date. I went out with her to escape the environment, and abusers taunts. One day while I was out with her, I stayed with her at her boyfriends shared house. It was late and I fell asleep, while waiting for her to come back from his bedroom. I woke up to some guy who sexually assaulted me. I was too scared to tell any adult at age 12 after such a toxic life, and lack of support. I told the girl who was 15 years old, but no one else. She wanted to report it as a crime, but from my prior experience I felt I would be blamed. Especially as this time, I was out without permission all night with her. This sexual assault went unnoticed, and I do not know if the girl told anyone else. If she did no one said nothing to me at the time, or within the 2020 statutory report.

After the second assault while living in this placement by two people within and outside the home. I ended up having an emotional breakdown, from the toxic environment and harm, and was sent to another children’s home. But this children’s home, was not an ordinary children’s home. It was a home for mostly criminal children, some of which were on remand for crimes. I had committed no crime. My behavioral outbursts related to trauma, were used as a reason. I was still 12 years old, and I was placed with teenage criminals, in another teenage environment. The differences this time were, the teenagers took drugs, did vehicle and petty crimes, and were arrested a lot.

Foster placement number 5

Placement number 5 was a notorious children home in 2a Newton Road, Cadbury Heath. Which had a bad reputation and was known in the local news. Living in placement number 5 was hard, as I was surrounded by criminal street type children. I had no street knowledge at all, and did not understand crime or the concept of the criminal system. I was in survival mode. Abuse, neglect and a persistent lack of emotional support made it impossible at this stage to thrive.

This children’s placement was on a huge complex with a male and female wing. Each environment I was moved to, I was expected to fit in with the children already placed there. I feel like this placement was punishment, as my social worker acknowledges in records I was finding it hard. Why would they keep me there to be physically assaulted?

The day comprised of children going out committing crime, and smoking and take drugs. I saw teens taking cocaine, along with cannabis regularly. The teens gave me cannabis, despite me being 11 years old. I assume they did not give me cocaine because they were addicts, and needed their fix. I saw robberies, and was arrested for the first time in this placement. After I was taken in a stolen a car one day, by two older girls from the home. I did not get charged at the time, though I was arrested and kept in a cell for a while.

I wasn’t sexually assaulted within placement number 5. There was neglect, bullying, neglect, physical, and emotional abuse within this placement. I was being exposed to things and criminals minds I should not have been exposed to. I was not a criminal, and did not wake up thinking about committing crime. I was bullied and stripped naked for not having the same criminal violent mindset. I just couldn’t watch a robbery and not cry and have a meltdown. I was sent out with criminal teenagers on remand, to the wolves. Placing me here was a failure. I should have been placed within a specialist mental health trauma place for children. Where I would have had opportunity to heal and thrive in childhood. Instead to tackle my trauma, the decision was made to place me within an environments that made me a target.

I was also at this point illegally taken out of school, while being given no specialist therapy for obvious trauma. Staff did not have much control, and the children’s home was a dumping ground, in my opinion. Where children were not meant to flourish or thrive, but just exist and make it to adulthood. If they made it to adulthood, they were discharged from care, and no longer social cares problem.

Abolition of Newton Rd

The home at newton rd. was abolished like so many notorious ones do in around 2018, with new buildings being established in 2019. Part of me feels like destroying the children’s homes, also destroyed evidence forever. It really is hard to process it any other way, when justice and evidence walk hand in hand. Often abuse becomes historic before it comes to light, and children just cant be pro-active in their own protection. I think in terms of children’s homes and mitigating destroying evidence. I suggest take images of the homes, both outside and inside, and label it correctly. Its a way to actively protect and help children who are unfortunate to be abused whilst in state care.

What do you think would pro actively help mitigate destroying possible evidence, when destroying children’s homes?

Do you think taking images of the outside and inside of children’s homes, before destroying them should be made mandatory? Taking images would mean readily available evidence for legal teams and investigators. What issues do you think would arise from making this a mandatory action?

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Foster Care *Trigger Warning*

Posted on March 31, 2025 by societyshiddensecret

I was born in Bristol City, England UK in 1979, after my parents relocated to Bristol in the early 1970s. Most of my childhood was spent growing up during the 1980s and 90s. Bristol has a rich complex history, and is one of the old triangular trade ports within the UK. There was a history or racial tensions, and resistance within Bristol, when it was becoming more diverse. In April 1980s there was the Saint Paul’s riots and unrest, after police raided a cafe. It took place within a largely Caribbean community, due to racism, isolation and poverty and the aggressive raid.

In around 1987 aged around 8 years old, I was placed on a care order under Bristol City Councils care. At the time Bristol City made up one part of Avon County, before becoming standalone on the 1st April 1996. Before the 1987 care order, I went into care on a temporary basis on occasions, a couple of times.

Foster Placement One

My first long-term foster placement was in an area called Seamills, in Bristol. It was a posh road, with people who owned their own homes. The foster parents were well meaning, but had innate racial biases, and were at times abusive. The good part was the outdoor activities and holidays which were paid for by social care. This was good because I experienced things, and because they didn’t keep the money for themselves. The bad parts were being hit, my hair ripped out, shouted at, and being punished for not eating unfamiliar food. Punishment also involved being forced to sleep on the stone tiled floor, within their kitchen.

The school I attended at the time was a predominantly white school, with no teachers of colour. I was one of the two children of colour. During the 80s the area had rooted issues with racism towards people from other cultures. People within the area normalized the use of N word to describe individuals with black heritage. It became the norm to be racially abused, and called names like w*g, c**n. Which I did not really understand deeply, at age eight years old. I just knew I was being teased, and isolated.

One day while at my church of England Primary School, in Stoke Bishop. My teacher showed me a photograph from one of those instant cameras from the 80s. With me and around six or more other girls, all lined up doing handstands with our underwear showing. He had a big grin on his face. I believe this was the start of his targeted grooming, and seeing if I would tell anyone. After the photo incident, he gave me a teddy bear in front of the all the children in class. He made me feel like I was not invisible, that I was liked as a person. Something I was deprived of as a child in foster care at the time. I have no idea why I was alone with him in class. But when I displayed fear and started backing away. He soothed me with his apologies, and he said “I will burn the picture”. Being too young to see the red flag I was happy with his apology and burning of the picture. I believed and trusted him at eight years old.

The teacher groomed my trust, to get me comfortable in the classroom with him alone. I did not know that what he was doing was criminal, and voyeurism at the time. His grooming led up to an incident of sexual assault in a school cupboard, where he left me. The teacher who assaulted me left DNA behind, but my young mind processed it as I wet myself. I was found sleeping by another teacher searching the school grounds for me. I was scolded by the teacher who found me for being ‘missing’. I was never asked why I was missing, or if anyone else was involved. I felt sad and fearful, sitting with the other children afterwards, in the dinner hall. It was my first sexual assault in foster care, and I had no one to turn to. I feel like the teacher planned it all, targeting me because I was in foster care, and a easy target. I also do not feel like I was his only victim. He was to confidence in abusing in a school environment, where other adults were around in abundance.

I was eventually moved from this home, because social services didn’t like the racial bias, I was being exposed to. And because the foster parents told me it would get worse for me, if I continued to tell about racism. They felt moving me was the only choice, because they did not like I no longer spoke to them.

Foster Family Two

Like foster family one, foster family two owned their own home in a nice area. They were a racially blended couple, whom provided me with some stability and routine. I went to a new school which was slightly more blended in terms of children who attended. I made a few new friends. My new foster parents did not do activities, but took they did take me on a holiday with them. The foster mother also taught me to cook a few things, skills I still use in today’s times.

I did not experience any CSA within this placement. I was though emotionally neglected, character assassinated, and made into the problem. By made into the problem, I mean the new foster mother suspected I had been sexually abused within weeks. She informed social care teams, and social care told her take me to the doctors. Doctors recorded unexplained unnatural scratches down there, and requested that it should be explored. By explored the doctor meant, that the suspected sexual abuse should be investigated further. It was not followed up, explored, investigated or nothing. Instead it was hoped it would all I guess go away at the time. Maybe it would have been repressed, if I was not targeted repetitively by child predators. Also there is no medical science that says that repressed memories stay repressed. So the go away, was in the immediate sense of consequences at the time, not of future and of well-being.

At around aged 9 or 10 years old, my long-term foster parents had a family funeral to plan abroad. as a result I was sent to temporary foster parents, to stay for the duration of the funeral. While at the temporary foster placement, I was sexually assaulted by a lodger, who rented one of the spare rooms. I told the temporary foster parent he came into my room last night, at breakfast before school. He told her he was turning my light off, and even though I said he did not.. No one listened to me, and no one spoke to me about my complaint again. This temporary foster parent told my long term foster parent, that she didn’t believe me. My long-term foster parent, did not speak to me, believing the lodger, and career. She told social care team about my allegations, and that I might tell lies on grown men. I felt blamed and let down by those responsible, whom also character assassinated me.

I was also let down by social care teams who did not investigate further, when I disclosed to them directly. About not liking him the lodger touching me down there, when I was picked by a social worker. She told the manager at the time, who told her to tell me nothing will done about it. I was then treated poorly by my long-term foster parents, who were suspicious and paranoid. This led to the breakdown in the placement and I was basically not wanted by the foster parents. Who also was given another foster child, shortly before I was moved by my social care teams. I was living with trauma, and confusion about what happened to me. I did not feel safe. No one spoke to me about their suspicions, or about my rights as an individual.

I was essentially left to think sexual abuse was a normal part of growing up, and childhood. I thought something was wrong with me not liking the abuse, at the time. It really affected my understanding of the world, and the people within it. I started displaying behavior that children who are sexually abused do, but it was used to attack my character. The suspected sexual abuse was not reported to police or bodies qualified to investigate. Had social care teams investigated further. They would have linked the other children’s complaint of being scared of a male at nighttime, coming in their room. The same room all foster children were made to sleep in, including me. I was offered no support at all at the time, and i doubt the other children were given support either.

Statutory Investigation report 2020

In 2020 a report uncovered that I was not the only or first child, who complained about abuse. In fact multiple children had complained about a man in their room at night. To me red flags were there, because all the complaints were about a male at night, alongside fear and crying. The foster parent didn’t question why her lodger kept going in the foster children’s rooms at the time. The temporary foster parent spread her denials to third parties. Which created pathways of slander, neglect, and unfair treatment, instead of well-being. Towards the children whom did try and speak out about the abuse happening within placements. It was a form of psychological abuse, and gas-lighting. It is unforgivable that there was ample opportunity at the time, to stop the abuser before he abused again. I was called a liar to silence me at the time, along with other children before me. So that those whom were making money through their employment, had opportunity to continue to do so.

If at the time the right policies had been followed, jobs would have been on the line. I am certain at least a a few professionals if not more, thought about financial and employment consequences. Foster children can and do become cash cows, within these types of environments. The lodger (her friend) went back to his home country. He did not face charges for his crimes against children, neither any consequences for his actions at all. I believe he molested more than the three children. This was a temporary foster placement, where children rotated in and out, whom were disbelieved. It was in my opinion it was a perfect place to continue to target children, unchallenged and unchecked. According to the 2020 report, an effort to check his criminal background was undertaken on the day I left. Social care teams did not know of his existence until I informed them, when I left when I reported abuse. Police expressed that he had there was no evidence of any DBS checks on the lodger. Yet social services took the foster mothers word, that it had been done at the time. This was a huge and dangerous assumption to make, not just convenient for allegation rebuttals, and failures.

There is in my opinion no other reason not to pursue an allegation, or multiple allegations of child abuse. Other than you were protecting something, and when you weigh up what social care is, does and receives. There are only certain reasons someone would not report abuse. That happens within a place which is supposed to combat abuse! And apparently no one knows nothing, but everyone is a paid professional? It really is absurd when you think about it, an institution full of professional’s. I still find it hard to wrap my head around that part, professionals are supposed to do better than average.

Has any one else experienced abuse while living in foster care or in a children’s homes? Was it a one time experience, or do you feel like you were targeted while living within the government setup? Have you identified any patterns of practice that adds to the issues of abuse within foster care? What do you think needs to be done to bring improvements, when abuse does happen?

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Utilizing Recovered Memories

Posted on February 24, 2025 by societyshiddensecret

I thought I would post more about my experience of memory recovery, and how it worked for me.

First I will touch on the fact that repression of memories doesn’t happen on its own. It happens because care givers around you are neglectful, and often disclosures go ignored. Also being of younger age group can impact how you process information about in events of abuse. So these things among other things like immediate survival, often play there part. In creating an environment where repression is the most healthiest way to survive.

When I first started to recover memories, it was lots of still images, that did not make much sense. They made no sense because I had no memory of the events, but they were very real. The still images lasted for around 4 months for one event of abuse, and they were terrifyingly real. Eventually the images as if remembered snippet by snippet, played backwards, like a video in rewind. Once my mind processed the images, and it was put in order backwards, it played forward. I relived the event of abuse, to the point it felt like I was there in person. It was not nice at the time. But it needed to happen, and I gained a lot of evidence while reliving the memories. As information is vivid, and in a detail, unlike other memories. One in which you can almost look around in your memory, and collect information. Because even though a child when it happened, when in recovery, you have adult sense to help you.

Although one can forget the images, and memories of events. There are cues, and physical memories that cause impacts. For example, I was scared of the dark, and had trouble closing my eyes, even to wash my face. It felt like I needed to keep my eyes open to protect myself, while I was in the bath. Closing my eyes, my anxiety goes high very quickly. So I learned to wash my face with one eye partially open (hahaha), or wash it when I get out. It is still a work in progress, and I do not beat myself up for not feeling safe, when bathing. My logical mind knows nothing will happen, but my autopilot, and auto-memory has my last nerve not taking a chance. With the cue being the dark, and me being physically exposed, it triggers the autopilot memory. Often social cues at the time of events can have a forefront impact regardless of any memory repression. For me being abused in my bed at night, and waking up during the abuse. It did something to my senses in terms of closing my eyes, and it being dangerous to my immediate survival. Its ingrained within my autopilot memory.

In terms of your thinking mind, and processing that you are having recovered memories. For me I went through stages of shock, in that how does a person forget such horrific events. It took me a long time to wrap my head around it, and find words to explain it. Then seeking evidence, and feeling my trust for people plummet. I felt lied to about my reality, even though, it was not directly. I recovered memories mainly between 2006, and 2015. It covered a large part of my existence, and took up time I should have been spending of something else. Managing recovered memories, and the consequences that come with finding evidence, is exhausting, and detrimental to well-being. Once my memories were mostly retrieved, processed and analyzed. I felt more stabilized, and learned to trust myself and my own analysis of my experience first and foremost.

In thinking about recovered memories, and how there are stages of retrieval. I do think victims of CSA are let down, because crucial times that should be used to gather evidence. Is not really utilized, because there is a lack of structure to accommodate that in society. Partially because there was a long-term bias, towards the nature of recovered memories in itself. Limited work has been done in terms of how recovery can be utilized, to aid evidence collecting. Than retrieval of memories being seen as a potential flaw to the legal process, and weapon for the opposing team. I hope in the future things get better, and people start seeing the potential in the detailed memory retrieval provides. There are crucial windows being missed, and new infrastructure to accommodate these windows needs to made. Specialist therapists need to be available long-term, to record things as it happens.

What was your experience of recovering memory like? Were there any similarities to my own experience?

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CSA: From a legal perspective.

Posted on February 16, 2025 by societyshiddensecret

To be clear from the start. When looking at your experience from a legal perspective, the therapeutic side does not really come into it. Legal and therapy are too different entities that have too different jobs to do. In blunt terms legal cases can be brutal, and can take a long time to get anywhere if at all. I will discuss my experience below.

When I started to want a sense of justice and did not know what it looked like. I did not know I would need to actively seek out evidence. I did not know anything sexual offenses laws, or people who work in the field. But once I realized that my word without evidence meant my case would not stand a chance. I started to seek evidence, utilizing anything I felt would lead to evidence. I used old pictures to find old old schools, using the emblems on jumpers. I used google maps to find old placements where I was abused. I used online local websites where you can ask public questions to local authorities, and its a formal record. I used these to question who was responsible for abuse of children in the area i grew up. I used them to ask about missing children between dates.

I also put together a formal letter of complaint to the local authority Bristol City Council. It included all images of placements where I experienced harm, that I collected from google. Detailing my abuse, and how I felt they had let me down and failed my care. I asked for a statutory complaint, which got to stage 1, and they found in my favor. What that means is they found that although they did not collect evidence of my abuse, against guidelines. There was enough professionals and placements stating sexual abuse in records throughout a period of 5 years. And records of other children complaining of similar harm, and disclosures by me. Along with failure to follow up disclosures, and failure to follow up suspicions of sexual trauma and harm.

I disclosed three times to those looking after me, at different points while under age 18 years old. I complained to the foster parent, and I complained to my social worker, when aged around 10 year old. I later complained again directly to another social worker, and they still did nothing when aged 16/17 years old. Social care teams removed me from their care aged 18 years old, having sat on my abuse for 5 years. I was living in their care permanently from aged 8 to 18 years old. Before I turned 8 years old, I had lived in their care temporarily on and off.

So the evidence I was left with after going through long processes to seek justice in criminal court. Was no DNA evidence, as it was lost at the time, when no action was taken to investigate. I received an apology from the social care team who failed me. There was an admission that abuse happened, as stated by many professionals who saw abuse related trauma. The statutory report found that they failed in their duty to report to relevant bodies multiple times. They also did not maintain a record of my voice, or follow up the many suspicions of sexual abuse. There was no documentation of what actually happened to me at the time. So although they found evidence of neglect and professional reports of suspected harm, and failures. Because no one ever followed anything up there was no DNA evidence, or statements of my experience as a child. As would be expected. I gave everything to the police in 2020.

Police investigated twice after I complained directly to them in adulthood. In 2011, they did not take my allegations seriously, officers laughed during my interviews, and my case closed. Second time they gave me a choice of making a complaint, or them investigating my case properly. I chose the later. The second investigation was as thorough as it could be so many years later. And again my cases did not make it to court, due to lack of DNA & witness evidence/statements. I got to tell my experience, and the second time it was recorded properly by the police. I still get flash backs of the first interview though, when the police laughed within ear shot. Roared with laughter multiple officers loudly during my whole interview. On the interview tape, I even ask what the police are laughing at.. it was disturbing.

Needless to say with criminal court closed as an option. I moved onto civil court, and other options of recourse. Civil court, involves either paying large sums to a solicitor, or doing a no win no fee agreement, for remedy. It also involves a lower level of evidence to prove guilt to gain remedy. It is not that great of a secondary pathway, but is the only one we have generally in the UK. In the UK we also have CICA, which can be good, and bad depending on whether you use legal teams. If you use legal teams on a no win no fee basis, you pay out large sums, without proper justice.

Social care teams inefficiency to gather and record evidence, affected the outcome of my criminal cases. They decided multiple times not to report my abuse. There was no record of abuse in my files, yet multiple professionals caring for me, had spoken about sexual abuse. I suspected evidence would be removed from my records. So I requested that a list of names records, linked to me were searched too. Had I not done that, nothing would have been found within the statutory investigation. I disclosed directly multiple times, and i was not alone in complaining about the perpetrators. My experience when it comes to evidence, social care teams hold the power, and key. It is easy for them to write in children’s records that put them in a good light, and hide failures. No one is there to question the narrative, and the children are to vulnerable to question it themselves. That is why my voice in childhood was overlooked, ignored and omitted, no one really wanted the truth on record.

In my experience, the legal investigation side of fighting for justice from scratch, within the foster care system. Is zero to one in term of actually getting court justice, and actually heard by a court. Finding evidence to back your experience is hard, with many hindrances along the way. Those responsible do everything in their power to hide their failures. They drag things out, hide, deny and omit, in anyway they can, and refuse to take any legal accountability. Expect a fight. Because fighting for your rights is not just a saying, it actually is a matter of fact. It will not just fall in your lap, because no one will really cares about you, like you do. Create a support system for yourself, trusted people or organizations, and document everything! Set up therapy, ask them to document sessions, so you have a professional paper trail of your experience. Speak out about the injustices you faced in foster care, don’t let systemic failures, and bullying tactics silence you.

How were you treated by the police, and or social care teams. Was your voice heard? Did you get criminal justice? Was your abuse was covered up, by social teams responsible for your care? Feel free to comment.

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The Interrelation of CSA and Personal Circumstance.

Posted on February 2, 2025 by societyshiddensecret

Child sexual abuse affects every survivor differently — but the outcomes are not shaped by trauma alone. Class, race, gender, economics, and family systems interrelate with how survivors experience abuse, how they are responded to, and how they recover. Drawing from lived experience, this piece explores how social structures either hinder or empower survivors on their path to healing.

Section 1: Understanding Interrelation

Interrelation describes how a survivor’s experience of child sexual abuse (CSA) connects with their personal circumstances and background. These include class, race, sex, economic background, and family support systems. Each element interacts with one another — shaping not only the experience of abuse, but also how survivors are treated, supported, and believed.

Section 2: Economic Background and Access to Care

Survivors from wealthier backgrounds often have access to immediate and specialist mental health support. Financial stability opens doors to private therapy, rehabilitation, and trauma-informed care — without waiting lists.

By contrast, survivors from lower-income backgrounds face systemic barriers. NHS therapy services in the UK are limited, with waiting lists stretching months or years. Treatment is often short-term and unsuitable for complex trauma. This creates an unequal landscape where access to healing is determined by wealth, not need.

Section 3: Class and Social Perception

Class shapes how society perceives survivors. An affluent person entering rehab may be seen as proactive or strong, while a working-class person doing the same may be stigmatized.

Legal processes are also class-biased: wealthier survivors can afford private legal counsel, while those without resources must prove credibility before they are believed. They rely on overworked police systems, no-win-no-fee solicitors, and underfunded support services — often being dismissed or disbelieved.

Section 4: Race and Cultural Background

Race interrelates with both class and economic standing. Survivors from minority ethnic backgrounds frequently encounter bias and adultification. Such as being seen as less innocent, less credible, or less in need of protection.

Institutional responses often reflect systemic racism. Disclosures by Black or mixed-race children, for example, may be dismissed or under-recorded compared to those of white peers. This compounds trauma and silences survivors who are already marginalized.

Cultural norms also affect how abuse is defined and handled. Global differences — such as varying age of consent laws — show how society’s perception of childhood, adulthood, and agency changes across contexts.

Section 5: Sex Assigned at Birth and Gender Bias

Gender expectations profoundly shape how abuse is understood. Boys may be dismissed under “boys will be boys” attitudes, while girls face hyper-sexualization or victim-blaming. Society’s double standards mean that male victims struggle to be believed, and female victims are often shamed.

These gendered scripts reinforce silence — punishing those who break it.

Section 6: Family Systems and Support

Family structure is a critical factor in recovery. Survivors from stable, supportive families are more likely to receive consistent care, validation, and protection. They benefit from families who listen, advocate, and create safety.

Conversely, survivors from dysfunctional or neglectful families — where addiction, mental illness, or violence dominate — face additional trauma. Their feelings and experiences are often scapegoated, gaslit, or silenced. Without healthy attachment figures, recovery becomes a solitary struggle.

Section 7: My Personal Interrelations

In my own life, these interrelations were clear. I am mixed heritage — 47% white, 38% African and Caribbean, with traces of Indian, South American, and Chinese ancestry. I was biologically born female and live as a woman. These factors shaped how I was seen, and how my abuse disclosures were handled.

When I disclosed abuse as a child, Bristol City Council social workers claimed I “didn’t look abused.” They ignored and dismissed my words, while other children were taken seriously. The police laughed during one of my interviews. My background, appearance, and class all influenced the response I received — a clear example of institutional bias and systemic neglect.

I was trafficked at 13 years old, just weeks after my birthday. Evidence existed, but leads were shut down once they pointed to institutional failures. This pattern of concealment continued for decades.

Financially, being working-class limited my ability to access consistent therapy. NHS services were insufficient, and private therapy — at £115 per session — remains an ongoing burden. Healing should never depend on income, yet in the UK it often does.

Section 8: The Welfare System Barrier

Systems like the Department for Work and Pensions (DWP) are not trauma-informed. Their assessments demand “evidence” of daily impairment — an impossible task for survivors without specialist therapy or documentation.

When I left care at 16, Bristol City Council failed to report my abuse to DWP. As a result, I was denied medical and financial support that should have been mine by right. Bureaucratic negligence became a second form of victimization — preventing recovery and accountability.

Section 9: The Bigger Picture

A survivor’s background — economic, racial, familial, or otherwise — profoundly impacts their healing journey. Access to justice, therapy, and dignity often depends on social status, not the severity of trauma.

Until systems acknowledge these interrelations, the cycle of inequality continues. Wealth, class, race, and gender should not determine who is believed, who is supported, who heals, and who is silenced.

Conclusion

To truly address child sexual abuse, we must look beyond individual cases — and into the systems that sustain silence. Healing should be a right, not a privilege. Equality in care, justice, and support is not only possible — it is necessary.

Reflection Prompt (for audience engagement):

How do you think personal circumstances — like class, race, or family — have influenced your experience or recovery? What systemic barriers have you faced in seeking help or justice?

Share your story below. Your voice matters.

Herman, J. L. (1992). Trauma and Recovery. Basic Books.

NSPCC (2023). Child Sexual Abuse: Statistics and Inequality in Access to Support.

Home Office (2022). Race Disparity Audit in Child Protection Systems.

Public Health England (2021). Socioeconomic Inequalities and Mental Health Outcomes.

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Are Recovered Memories Real?

Posted on January 9, 2025 by societyshiddensecret

What a title, and what a war recovered memories saga had on society, the courts and world. When I first learned about recovered memories, it was the only thing that explained what I had gone through. For me, every little bit of it was real. of course opposing sides, claim that recovered memories were flawed and not reliable. Also that recovered memories could be inaccurate, which meant that memories alone could not be relied upon in courts.

There has been extensive literature on recovered memories. A long debate existed about their validity and whether they can be accepted within a legal framework. One of my favorite scientists is Jennifer Freyd, who gave me will and motivation to finish my degree. Her work and theories on Institutional betrayal were helpful (Smith & Freyd 2014). They contributed to my own healing. They also assisted in my thinking and management of living with CSA. The concept of institutional betrayal was the only thing that explained the dynamic of experiencing CSA, while in protective custody. Without Freyds work. I would have less understanding of my circumstance, in a way where it makes sense to my lived experience. I highly recommend learning about Jennifer Freyd, and her work and journey.

All abuse is bad, but when an institution is involved it makes the experience have an added element of betrayal. As institutions are supposed to have the welfare of the people it serves at heart. So when an institution hides, minimizes, or otherwise doesn’t act. It can serve as message that they can’t be trusted to do the right thing, and take accountability. By not taking accountability survivors are left at the will of getting help anyway they can. Which can often lead to further exploitation by other bodies, who know survivors need help and want justice.

The institution that was responsible for my care, had 10 + people talking about CSA in my childhood. But not one of them reported it to the police once. The betrayal I felt was immense, and did last for a while. I still feel betrayal, but my initial shock and anger has subsided. Now I just want to expose the people, and do when i get the opportunity to do so. Why should they live a life, unquestioned like nothing happened. I disclosed to my social worker, who told the manager. The manger didn’t act, and didn’t follow guidelines. The manager who works for social services in Bristol today, is a liar. She covers up child sexual abuse of looked after children. She covered up my sexual abuse. But had the power to help dictate my statutory complaint in 2019/2020. Of course she found no wrongdoing in herself. She ensured that she didn’t follow routes that would expose her.

Smith, C. P., & Freyd, J. J. (2014). Institutional betrayal. American Psychologist, 69(6), 575–587. https://doi.org/10.1037/a0037564

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